21. Aug, 2014

You do not Understand!

There are many situations we go through in life that people just do not understand. They were not there when you were broken, lost, depressed, bullied, homeless, raped, molested, victimised, abused, convicted, confused, diagnosed with a sickness, disabled, struggling, hungry, thirsty, repeating another year of university, when your sister died, jobless; the list goes on. There were not there so they cannot simply understand. 

Everyone knows how deep my love for Jennifer Hudson goes but what people do not realise, is that it is not my love for her but what she represented in my life when I was completely broken. Her music not only inspired me but motivated me. I thought that her words were actually speaking to my situation. I felt like she got me; like she understood what i was going through. I would play her song back to back until I knew it word for word.

What youths nowadays fail to comprehend is that music has a deadly and positive influence over our mental state. The hype of a song or meloncholoy of a tone can pressure our subconcious to do the unattainable. Music has a detrimental effect on our destinies that cannot be taken a light. I am not telling any of you to stop listening to the songs you do; far from! Just think about the lyrics you hear in the song? Ask yourself is it right? 

Well back to my stroy....

So Jennifer Hudson had a free concert the other day at Rockafeller Centre. I was so over the moon with exictement that I was going to meet my icon after years of anticipation. So the night before the big day, my eyelashes fell off and people who know me, know that I will never go anywhere public without them. I do not know why I need them to feel confident in myself. So I refused to get up for the show until he spoke saying "baby go to the mirror - look at yourself. You are beautiful and you do not need self modification or enhancements. So I got up at 4am and started to get ready. I couldnt even begin to process the fact that I was finally going to meet her. She finally arrived the stage for tech runs at 7am. I was somewhere in the middle of the crowd just already crying my eyes out. All of a sudden one of the Shows presenters asked me if i wanted to be onstage with JHUD. 

I was thinking nah bruv this is a joke!

What was more sereel was the fact that I already had a dream about this which is what scared me. This is the part that is still getting to me. How amazing he is and how he shows us of his sovereign power. He revealed to me what will happen and I had so much doubts and then he shows up amazes you beyond human comprehension. God is a faithful God. He will pick you from the crowd and shine his faithfulness upon you. When you feel like no one notices you, just know that our God has your back and in his timing, he will pick you up and take you to higher heights. God doesn't do his things little! When he calls you - he will enable you to explode! People that mocked you and cursed you will be in amaze! All you need to do now is trust in his ability and have faith in the impossible! Have what I call 'stupid' faith! Faith can change a verdict! Even if your account is saying minus God will will turn in into a surplus! Do not allow your situational analysis to determine your future!

I mean my God is amazing. How can Student Finance magically pay me a random payment? I was so broken and empty God knows! But he showed up in a way that I cannot explain! Trust me if he did it for me, he will do it for you! Our God is a God that will turn accidents into miracles! Nothing is accidental with him! 

What I have been learning is not to be praying 'a miss'. I use to pray and pray for hours but I did not actually understand nor grasp what I was doing. I thought saying all these fancy words, crying and shouting will bring a change! Now I declare matters! One word! He shows up! My faith backs me up! It is one thing to say something and do another! I never truly believed in his soverienty or that he could really do the impossible until now. Over and Over again he shows up in my single declaration! He is truly God. Everytime before the last I am in utter amazement at his power. Everytime is better than last. 

So for the whole show I was there on Stage with Jennifer Hudson which was amazing and we had a conversation and she siad she 'loved my hat' and even shouted out to 'my london girl'. It was an amazing experience but what still gives me shivers is how they can pick us out of a crowd. Just like that. And how I already saw everything before it happened. (My sis can testify)

What we fail to realise is that when you are walking with him, he will cause your face to shine and make you stand out. 

So why not join me and Stand out For Christ!